“Lisa, if I’ve learned anything, it’s that life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish … Now what I'm with isn't 'it' anymore and what’s 'it' seems weird and scary. Homer! The friendship between the Simpsons and the Van Houtens is challenged when a painting the Simpsons buy from the Van Houtens' yard sale is discovered to be extremely valuable. Abe Simpson has managed to last over 30 seasons of the show despite always seeming like he's on the verge of death. Homer: Bart! (Bart and Lisa's breakfast with Grampa)Grampa: (Pours Lisa a cup of coffee) Sugar?Lisa: (Nervous) Yes, ten please.Bart: (Rattlin') Hey Grampa, top me off!Grampa: Are you sure your Ma let you kids drink coffee?Bart: FOR THE LAST TIME, YES!!!! In one particularly incredible tale, Abe explains that he posed as a female burlesque dancer during World War II when stuck behind enemy lines. RELATED: 10 Jokes From The Simpsons That Have Already Aged Poorly. Come on Homer what are her faults? It was directed by Mike B. Anderson, written by Richard Appel and featured Willem Dafoe in a guest spot as the school' . Never. Oh. Abe Simpson is one of the funniest members of the Simpsons family - and these quotes just prove it! The best quotes from The Simpsons (1989) in season 14. You're Homer's sister-in-law, right? Chief Wiggum: Well, well, well! Then he realizes it's actually a stroke. The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 20 Quotes. He chews with his mouth open, he gambles, he hangs out at a seedy bar with bums and low lifes.Homer: Oh it's true!Lovejoy: Homer don't interrupt.Marge: He blows his nose on the towels and then puts them back in the middle!Homer: I only did that a couple of times! | Tagged: Blame, voted, politician. Add more and vote on your favourites! "The Bart of War" is the twenty-first episode of the fourteenth season of The Simpsons. The War of Art. It first aired on the Fox network in the United States on May 18, 2003. "Hors doovers." RELATED: The Simpsons: 5 Relationships Fans Were Behind (& 5 They Rejected). Simpsons creator Matt Groening comments that this dialogue sums up the whole show.] When Abe is invited to speak to Bart's class, he is able to teach them a bit of untold America history. Oh, meltdown. The best quotes from The Simpsons (1989). About Us | Copyright Inquiry | Privacy Policy | Contact Us. The War of the Simpsons Barney: (to Patty) Hey! Page 7 of 11. Here are some of Abe Simpsons' funniest quotes from The Simpsons. The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 20 The War of the Simpsons. Oh, son, when you're older, you'll know better. Abe's wonderfully confused response suggests he really doesn't get out much. The show has a reputation of having a lot of fans in the older demographic and Abe certainly counts himself as one of them. Reverend Lovejoy: John, why don't you speak? Add more and vote on your favourites! It's something we all experience and Abe has some wise and funny things to say on the matter. It’s one of these annoying buzzwords. Everyone's against me! After Bart and Milhouse are caught by the police sneaking inside Ned's Beatles memorabilia … Under adult supervision, they are then placed in separate youth groups, but the groups go to war. John S.: She never cooks, she doesn't keep a clean house, she [shouts] Marge: The moral of this story is a good deed is its … While visiting the academy, Lisa sees that the school is far more challenging than hers and she decides that she wants to attend as well. It's time for bed. Rod: I'm sorry. Ned: Well, the folks at the Senior Center sure will love that peach tree we planted. His favorite pastime seems to be writing angry letters to anyone and everyone he can complain to. I dug up 11 quotes from The Simpsons that, in my opinion, are among the most profound, accurate and definitive takes on 11 different subjects ever made. “I don't think Dad is accurately portraying Native American life.”. Maybe a bit of both. We've never thrown a party. Directed By. Watch The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 20 online via TV Fanatic with over 6 options to watch the The Simpsons S2E20 full episode. Gloria S.: Johnny-boy hasn't been able to cut it, man-wise, for some time, not that I'd want stench of gin and sour defeat pressed against me. The letters don't often make any sense and it's hard to say if he thinks people will listen, but he writes them either way. Abe and Homer have never really seen eye-to-eye as father and son. He forgets birthdays, anniversaries, holidays. When Bart questions the validity of that story, Abe admits it's only partially true, although it suggests the true story might be just as interesting. And to pay for it, I'll give up the Civil War recreation society I love so much. I remember you. That was our wedding! After Homer and Marge encounter some sensitive marital trouble, Abe picks up on it and questions Homer if there is a problem with their sex life. Can be a... 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